First Scene, Untitled Play

7 comments (closed), posted on september 22, 2005, tags: fiction, plays

WILL. (Between two large bites.) How's the fish?
TINA. It's okay. Not great. (She puts her fork down.)
WILL. I told you to get the steak. (He takes a large bite, some food falls out of his mouth, he snaps it back up.) This steak is great.
TINA. Looks like it. (Silence.) Will. (Pause.) Will.
WILL. (He looks up.) What?
TINA. Are you going to talk to me, or are you just going to keep chomping away on that meat like an animal?
WILL. Sorry. (He puts down his fork and looks at her.) I'm sorry. (Pause.) What do you want to talk about?
TINA. Why do you always ask me that?
WILL. I don't know, I just—
TINA. Isn't there ever anything you want to talk about, without having to ask me first? I swear to God, you can never just start a conversation anymore.
WILL. You don't have to get so mad, I—It's not that I don't have anything to talk about, it's just I never know what you want to talk about.
TINA. I'll talk about ANYTHING! You make it seem like I'm some crazy person who can only talk about specific things, like I'll freak out if we're not talking about EXACTLY what I want to talk about. I don't care, I'll talk about anything. Just tell me something. Tell me something that happened today.
WILL. I'm sorry, I'm not trying to piss you—
TINA. ANYTHING, Will. Please!
WILL. (Pause.) Well, I found twenty bucks in the bathroom at lunch.
TINA. Really? See, that's great. Where?
WILL. In the bathroom.
TINA. No, I mean where—at a restaurant?
WILL. Uh, at work. In the bathroom at work.
TINA. Oh. But don't you think—isn't that money probably someone else's? Someone you work with?
WILL. (He shrugs and resumes eating.) What do I care? I found it. Finders, keepers.
TINA. (Silence. Tina looks at Will, hard.) Will, I want a divorce.
WILL. (Food in his mouth.) What?
TINA. I mean it, I want a divorce. I don't—
WILL. Because I found a twenty, you want to divorce me?
TINA. It's not because of—
WILL. I'll give it back, okay? It's not a big deal! I don't even need—
TINA. It's not the money! (Pause. Quietly.) I slept with him.
WILL. What?
TINA. I slept with Ted.
WILL. Ted? Who's Te—my dad? You slept with my dad?
TINA. Yes. (Silence.)
WILL. But... (Pause.) Why would you do that?
TINA. I don't know. I'm sorry. It just—it just happened. I didn't plan it.
WILL. But, I mean, my God, Tina. My father? What the fuck is wrong with you?
TINA. I know. (Pause.) I know, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have—
WILL. You're damn right you shouldn't have!
TINA. I'm sorry, Will.
WILL. I don't care how sorry you are, Tina. I don't care. You can't take this back. (Pause.) My dad is 75 years old, Tina!
TINA. I know, I—
WILL. 75!
TINA. Keep your voice down! I know how old he is.
WILL. I will not keep my voice down! You're fucking my dad, who's old enough to be your grandfather, and you're telling me to keep my voice down? You're sick!
TINA. I'm in love with him.
WILL. Oh, God. I knew it! I knew you were sick. I could feel it when we first met. I thought to myself, don't do it, Will, she's—
TINA. You couldn't feel anything, don't make stuff up just because you're mad at me.
WILL. I did feel it! I should have known you would do something like this. I'm 10 years older than you, it was only a matter of time before you moved on to an even older guy. You're going up the ladder toward WWII veterans, you sick—
TINA. Oh, give it a rest, Will! You know damn well this has nothing to do with his age. Or yours!
WILL. So what is it, the money? You going to marry him and then wait for him to die?
TINA. Your dad doesn't have any money, Will. Either do you.
WILL. We do just fine! I never heard you complaining before.
TINA. And I'm not complaining about it now. Money isn't the problem.
WILL. (Silence.) Then what is?
TINA. I'm in love with him, Will. I'm sorry.
WILL. (Silence.) Fuck. (He picks up his fork and starts eating again. Long silence.) You're paying for your own dinner.
TINA. Fine. (They eat in silence. Blackout.)

What Happened to You, Maniaca?

4 comments (closed), posted on september 13, 2005, tags: announcement, site

I've wanted to write here so many times in the past month or so, but I just haven't had it in me. It's not that I don't like writing—in fact, the new project I'm getting ready to launch is all about writing. I love writing. The problem is, I'm finding I have a lot less to say to the audience this site has. Way, way, way back in the day, this site was a place where I wrote semi-offensive, often funny things. Stories, short plays, rants, et cetera (hell, even poems), but over time, this place turned into mostly a site about technology and the internet. I love those things too, but so do forty bajillion other people who all have weblogs, 99% of whom are better writers.

Therefore, I find myself in a bit of a pickle.

I love this site, and I don't want to end it. But, at the same time, I don't think I can successfully run it the way it has been for the last few years. I just don't have enough compelling stuff to say about technology any more. It's mostly "I love this," and "I hate that." You don't really need to hear that. Don't get me wrong—no matter how I try to avoid it, technology and the web remain endlessly interesting to me and I will always sneak in commentary on the subject here and there.

But, for the most part, I think this site is going to go back to its roots a little. With the launch of my new project, and with a return to more fiction, this place will change. I hope you'll all stick around.

What's Up, Dickyweed?

5 comments (closed), posted on september 11, 2005, tags: me, summer, work

Wow. Summer went by fast this year, eh? We spent most of our time at the pool, swimming and going down the water slides and jumping off the diving board. It was like being children again; the water was warm, the sun was out, and we were swallowing water and doing hand-stands and cannonballs and having races. It was more fun than I've had in a long time, and I'm truly going to miss it. Winter usually feels long enough without thinking about how much we miss the pool every weekend. Oh well. Next summer will be here before we know it.

Work has been hectic. Katia and I had a vacation planned to Seattle, but we had to cancel it due to a large project at work which I'm finally getting close to finishing now. A few weeks of late nights, but I've made it through and I'm not too much worse for the wear, other than the fact that I feel like I need a vacation more than ever. Hopefully we'll get to go somewhere soon.

I finished up my first Ruby on Rails project (which I will announce here soon), and I am absolutely smitten with the framework. I definitely plan to use it on the next thing I do, and hopefully get it happening at work as well.

Oh, and in case you're wondering, the title of this entry is heavily inspired by the book I'm reading. If you can guess what it is, you'll win a cookie.

What did you do with your summer?